The Wide Circumference of Love by Marita Golden
Book Blurb:
You just can’t plan for this kind of thing.
Diane Tate certainly hasn’t. She never expected to slowly lose her talented husband to the debilitating effects of early-onset dementia. As a respected family court judge, she’s spent her life making tough calls, but when her sixty-eight-year-old husband’s health worsens and Diane is forced to move him into an assisted living facility, it seems her world is spinning out of control. As Gregory’s memory wavers and fades, Diane and her children must reexamine their connection to the man he once was—and learn to love the man he has become. For Diane’s daughter Lauren, it means honoring her father by following in his footsteps as a successful architect. But for her son Sean, it means finding a way to finally forge a bond with his father before it’s too late. Supporting her children as they find new footing in a changing landscape, Diane remains resolute in her goal to keep her family together—until her husband finds love with another resident of the facility. Suddenly faced with an uncertain future, Diane must choose a new path and discover her own capacity for love. Will she choose renewal, or regret?
My Review: 4.5 stars
The Wide Circumference of Love tackles family, romance, responsibility, guilt and dementia. Golden has written an intimate story about the effects of dementia on family and friends and explores what we’re really capable of. The title describes my feelings about this book. Her scope was wide enough that this didn’t read as a “depressing” book, but more as a story of love, loss and hope.
Interestingly, I learned about this book when I was asked to facilitate a book club as part of a local event I’m participating in, called Arts and Alzheimer’s. I wasn’t familiar with the title but was glad to help in any way, small or large, for this group. Luckily, it was good book with loads to discuss – it will make for great conversation with loads to talk about. Everything from if/when you put your spouse in a home, safety issues (yours and theirs), genetic testing, relationships outside the marriage and more.
As much as I enjoyed the story, it was the writing that blew my socks off. Golden creates sentences with such grace and meaning. Endings are always suspect for me when they are too tidy, but in this circumstance, I was thrilled to receive a neatly packaged ending; the reader needed a dose of hope, rather than despair. There were so many beautiful passages that I notated, my book is now a rainbow of sticky notes. Definitely check out this book, fans of Still Alice by Lisa Genova will love it!
Quotes I liked:
All we are is memories, Bruce. That’s all we are. Even more than flesh and blood.”
“He sat cradled by his memories that felt on loan, battered and suspect.”
“You don’t get to fire your family because you can’t handle your life.”
“The treachery of this disease will make liars of us both.”